I wrote this poem in the few days between Eliana’s death and her funeral. One of my best friends read it at her service.

She’s Gone

My God, wake me up

I can’t take any more

Why don’t You answer?

I pound at Your door

I prayed and I pleaded

I begged You and cried

Why did You let

My baby girl die?

I don’t want to live

I don’t want to eat

I don’t want to breathe

I just want to sleep

Then I want to wake up

And see that she’s here

I want to wake up

Without any tears

I just want to hold her

And smell her sweet head

I open my eyes

Oh, God, she’s still dead

This nightmare won’t end

It just keeps going on

How can I live

With my baby gone?

My soul has been crushed

My heart broken in two

My mind is in shambles

I don’t know what to do

I cry, then I stop

Then I start yet again

I mourn and I grieve

For what should have been

Faith does not stop

The ache that’s inside

That started the day

That my angel died

It’s so hard to believe

In Your goodness and grace

When I can’t hear Your voice

And I can’t see Your face

I can only cling to the hope

That maybe someday

It won’t hurt as bad

As it hurts today

written by Deanna Parish

in loving memory of Eliana Parish